I'm At A Lost Cause!

[bella]

this may get long, ill keep it to the point. i wanted to use the sending love method or something like this (LOA stuff) but i dont think it can work for something big

i had no interest in going to university, but i was pressured by parents b/c they think that if you dont go then you'll never be successful. i only registered last year so that i could get my laptop. a year passed going there and i hate it. i knew uni was not for me, i hate sitting in long lectures and memorizing and reading. plus its so lonely there, nobody wants to talk to you unless they already knew you from HS. it sucks and i want to quit desperately (just so you know im attending school where i live with my parents).

but i cant quit b/c i dont have the resources to. i started secretly dropping all my classes sometime through the year and im not doing any work or exams or anything; im just pretending to attend. im scared to tell my parents about this or that i want to quit, cause if i do i will get kicked out from home and i will be absolutely in trouble then. my mom was so grim and mad at the possibility of me quitting, starts threats about living like homeless loser or that ill always be poor if i drop uni (that was in november).


i am desperate to leave and move to another city. i had different career plans the whole time, and i know i do not need university for it. i never tell anyone about my dreams, i would only get shot down and told to be "realistic" or that i cannot do it so its best to keep quiet.
i think i wouldve left by now, but i cannot, b/c i need a car. i cannot walk to another city, my parents would NEVER drive me there (of course not, i would not be supported at all after quitting school). they wont even consider buying me a car. i am so stuck b/c i have no money and cars are so overpriced


i want to manifest a free car but it such a big intention of me and its feels impossible b/c, i dont know how to get a new car wihtout buying one, and theres nobody who would ever give me a car either.

i feel very desperate, worried and i want to get out as soon as i can before i have to endure another semester at school this fall.
i wanted to be able to send love and gratitude for me desire but i cant help but be afraid it wont work, im impatient and frustrated that i didnt receive. b/c i wanted to do this a long time ago but NOTHNIG CHNAGES, MY CIRCUMSTANCES ALWAYS STAY THE SAME AND IM FRUSTRATED AND WORRIED ILL NEVER GET A CAR!

im being controlled by family and theior obsession with university always reminds me of being there and not being able to get out. i then start focusing on what i dont like, my current stuck-in-a-rut miserable university life

seriously i have outrageous dreams but i cannot take the next step (move to another city that has the job i want, its far away) all b/c i cant manfiest a car
help me please, sorry to sound desperate and mad, but i cannot find any LOA technique that will keep me relaxed and trusting the process, but i rather start worrying and get anxious if it'll ever come


im just wondering if something like sending love to your intentions (what Illusions posted) could actually create a miracle, cause i feel it cannot, im at a lost cause here. i never manifested anything huge such as a free car. any useful help would be appreicated, but please dont suggest EFT (fails me everytime) and i cannot afford to buy anyhing to help me

[Neight]

Hello bella
I am stepping way out of my experience level here, but I can relate to what you are saying, so I figured I would jump in with a bit of advice...
please don't take anything I have to say in a negative way, I am trying to help

First, the largest road block you are facing right now is not your parents or university or even lack of transportation. The biggest thing in your way right now is you

you are feeling very negative and afraid right now (which is very understandable) and it's blocking the love you are trying to send to your intentions.
you are afraid of being honest (always a mistake ) if you want something, you have to put that intention out to the universe in every way possible. there is a principal to life that I believe in Think Speak Do
whatever you spend your time thinking about, and speaking about, will happen in your life (thus the do)
at the moment, you are thinking and speaking fear and frustration, and you are getting mired in more of the problems you are trying to solve. you have to be honest, both to yourself, and to others about your intentions. you have to be at peace and filled with love, not fear.
Speak your intentions, even if only to yourself at first, to the universe. don't focus on getting a car to take you places, that is limiting to your goals. focus on what it is that you want, not what you need to get to get what you want. if a car is what you need, one will be provided to you, if your ultimate goal is what you keep in front of you.
I would say the first step is to rectify what you are doing right now. It will be tough, and I am sure things will seem to get worse before they get better, but if you keep hiding from your parents in their own house, you will never find the freedom you seek. sit down with them, talk to them openly and honestly. they are sure to have a very bad initial reaction, and you are probably right in that they will be very mad, and not supportive at all. But keep in mind one thing, they love you, and want the best for you, that is why they push you in the first place.
worst case scenario...
they kick you out of your house
now, lets look at where this leaves you. you will no longer have to lie or hide from your parents. you will also be free to pick up some kind of job locally to build up some resources. you may be forced to stay with some friends or sympathetic family members for a period of time, but with some hard work and determination, you can fairly quickly set yourself up for the big move you are wanting. if you adopt a policy of honesty, there will be nothing left to hide from.
as far as the job you are wanting to take, don't concern yourself so much with what others will say about your goals. I am about to say something that seems self evident, but people forget it all the time...
IT IS YOUR LIFE, NO ONE IS IN CONTROL BUT YOU!!
celebrate this fact everyday. you will find true freedom if you can always remember, no one can judge you, everyone has opinions, but in your life, yours is the most important!!!
I am speaking from personal experience here, I spent a lot of my life worrying about what others would think, and trying to gain acceptance.
I did something similar and enrolled in college, because people told me I should. all I got out of it was a few wasted years, and a mountain of student loans....
I hid everything from my family, and kept my goals hidden as well.
it took a lot of effort, and quite a bit of pain, but I chose to be honest, and to follow my heart. Now, I am well on my way to getting everything I ever wanted! I am finally in my own place, married and have a three year old daughter that is completely amazing!
I don't have a nice car, but I was able to find adequate transportation, and for very little money. I now spend most to all of my time doing things that I enjoy, and I am even starting to find a few ways to make some money doing it!
the universe will provide what you tell it you need. focus on the positive things you do have, and more importantly, focus on the goals you want to achieve, not the road blocks in your way.
if you focus on the road blocks, you will only find more and more of them.

I know you will feel like I am over-simplifying things, I used to feel the same way when I got similar advice. But everything I am saying to you, I have done for myself and it works. there is no mystical process that will magically open the doors for you. there are techniques that can help, but honestly, those only do one thing. they teach you how to focus your mind and intentions on what you want. It is impossible to find fulfillment if your soul is feeling empty. follow your dreams, make your own path. work towards your own goals!! the feelings you will have when you start to do that will help drive you forward. the first steps will be the hardest, no question about that (especially dealing with your parents...) but no one can do that for you, and if you don't take that first step, you will not be able to find a way out anyway.

one last thing...
I have been doing a lot of work on the renewable energy part of this forum, and there is a principal from that, which I am working on applying to my life in general.
if you want good energy to come into your life, you have to create a need for it. the universe is full of energy that we can tap at will if we create a need for it in our lives. Start living the way you want your life to be. plan your move, pack your bags, get things ready to go, and you will find that the universe will provide the energy needed to make use of that preparation.
in electrical work, we call it creating a dipole. cause an imbalance in energy, and the universe will freely provide even more energy to re-create balance. step out on a limb and take a chance. take yourself out of the balance you are currently living in, which isn't providing enough energy to get you where you want to go. make room for more energy, and then allow that energy to come into your life and create a new balance at a higher energy state.
that is a very simplified way of putting it, but I hope you get the picture I am creating here

I hope all of this makes sense. I am sorry I cannot give you a solid technique or process you can follow step by step, but honestly, in my life, I have found that what works best is simply to keep moving forward. stay positive, that is essential to getting anything that you want. the earth is negatively polarized, and you need to be a positive pole if you want some of that energy to flow into your life.
I am no expert, and still learning everyday myself, so take what I say with a grain of salt...
but I can relate to your story (I usually don't even check the other branches of this forum, I pretty well keep to the renewable energy part, so maybe the universe drew me to your post to give what little advice I had )
I hope this helps in some way, and I very sincerely hope you find the strength and determination to follow your heart and find the way to your goals!
Good Luck
N8

[ImBill]

Wow. Talk about being your own worst enemy... First of all, you probably should broaden your view of reality. Fortunately, that comes easier as you continue to live here. You don't need anything that you don't already have. You don't need a car to be happy. You are the one putting obstacles between yourself and happiness. What I hear you saying is that in order to be happy you need the following: a car, not going to school, not living with parents, having friends, move to another city, and a job. Then you are saying you can't have those things because you are afraid. Who is creating this fear? Who is keeping you from going after the things you want or arranging your life the way you want it to be? Is your parent's disapproval really that big of a deal? Who is it that wants to relax but ends up worrying instead? Who is controlling that? Where is it coming from?

No, it isn't as easy as wanting or sending love & gratitude to your wishes and desires. You have to intend for them to happen and then take the necessary steps to have them happen. Where you choose to focus your intention and attention controls what is going to manifest in your life. If you focus on negativity, guess what? You're going to be spending a lot of time lamenting your situation. If you instead choose to focus on positivity, guess what? Your life situation will mold itself to your vision of positivity. It's as simple as that.

Worry has no place in anyone's life. Throw it away forever. You don't need it. Better to get rid of it now while you are young. Replace it with confidence, knowledge, and commitment. When you are faced with a challenging situation like the one you describe yourself as being in now, be confident that you can solve it. Gain as much knowledge as you can about all aspects of the situation and all possible solutions that you can come up with. Use your knowledge and confidence to sift through your various options discarding those that won't work along the way. Take your best options and work on making them come to fruition. Relax, you now know that you are taking the best course of action to make your situation better.

Sometimes you will find that you are in a situation where you have little or no options. In that case, you can still control your mental attitude. You are the only one who can. Sooner or later, hopefully, you will come to the realization that you are totally in control of how you view things. You are not forced to view anything in any particular way. You have the ability to maintain your equanimity even under the most vicious and extreme conditions that you can imagine, once you have developed control of your self. And, if you aren't controlling your outlook, who is? Why are you letting them or it?

Sorry if I come across as being harsh. After reading Neight's post which must have been being written at the same time I was writing, I guess I was a little heavy handed. The thing that the world (and us as perceived individuals) needs right now is more spirituality. We need to loosen our grasp on materiality. We grip it much too firmly. Learn to meditate and expand your consciousness and awareness by becoming aware of your spiritual self and its connection to everything else. Do it often, whenever you find yourself with a few seconds or minutes with nothing else to do. Do it while engaged in activity that doesn't require a lot of mental effort. Set small goals for yourself, figure out how to achieve them, and then be grateful when you get the results you wanted. Something like being happy for an hour, not letting any of life's circumstances ruin your up attitude is a worthy goal.

Just as some background about myself so that you don't think you're alone or the only one who has to go through this kind of self-induced ordeal: I did not like the way my parents treated me as a child and vowed to leave as soon as I could. My dad came down hard on me a couple of times, once on my 18th birthday and again a couple of days later. I was still in high school and had a friend whose parents were nice to me. They let me move in with them for a couple of weeks until I arranged to move in with my older brother. I packed all my stuff and hitchhiked a few hundred miles. I was on welfare for a little while, took various odd jobs, and moved around quite a bit over the next few years. I tried the college thing and couldn't handle the responsibility at the time, so I quit. I found ways of getting what I needed. Of course, I didn't mind not having regular meals and a roof over my head on occasion. It was more about enjoying life at that time. Eventually, I packed all my stuff in a backpack and hitchhiked around some more. It took awhile, but I finally figured out that I wanted stability for a change, so I moved back in with my brother for a few weeks, found a job, found a girl, had a son, and it's all been downhill from there. Sure, there have been some traumas, but I survived. What life has taught me is that I can have whatever I want, materially, but it's not worth anything, really. It doesn't really exist in the first place, and I can't keep it in the second place. Everything goes away from you eventually except yourself and your relationship with yourself. Love yourself and you will always be happy. Let go of the fear as well. You might as well fear the hair on your head as anything else. There just is no substance to all of the things we fear. You are a goddess. Think like one and eventually you will be able to live like one. God has your back. You can never be lost. Trust in that with all your heart.

[Neight]

Wow. Talk about being your own worst enemy... First of all, you probably should broaden your view of reality. Fortunately, that comes easier as you continue to live here. You don't need anything that you don't already have. You don't need a car to be happy. You are the one putting obstacles between yourself and happiness. What I hear you saying is that in order to be happy you need the following: a car, not going to school, not living with parents, having friends, move to another city, and a job. Then you are saying you can't have those things because you are afraid. Who is creating this fear? Who is keeping you from going after the things you want or arranging your life the way you want it to be? Is your parent's disapproval really that big of a deal? Who is it that wants to relax but ends up worrying instead? Who is controlling that? Where is it coming from?

No, it isn't as easy as wanting or sending love & gratitude to your wishes and desires. You have to intend for them to happen and then take the necessary steps to have them happen. Where you choose to focus your intention and attention controls what is going to manifest in your life. If you focus on negativity, guess what? You're going to be spending a lot of time lamenting your situation. If you instead choose to focus on positivity, guess what? Your life situation will mold itself to your vision of positivity. It's as simple as that.

Worry has no place in anyone's life. Throw it away forever. You don't need it. Better to get rid of it now while you are young. Replace it with confidence, knowledge, and commitment. When you are faced with a challenging situation like the one you describe yourself as being in now, be confident that you can solve it. Gain as much knowledge as you can about all aspects of the situation and all possible solutions that you can come up with. Use your knowledge and confidence to sift through your various options discarding those that won't work along the way. Take your best options and work on making them come to fruition. Relax, you now know that you are taking the best course of action to make your situation better.

Sometimes you will find that you are in a situation where you have little or no options. In that case, you can still control your mental attitude. You are the only one who can. Sooner or later, hopefully, you will come to the realization that you are totally in control of how you view things. You are not forced to view anything in any particular way. You have the ability to maintain your equanimity even under the most vicious and extreme conditions that you can imagine, once you have developed control of your self. And, if you aren't controlling your outlook, who is? Why are you letting them or it?

very well said
couldn't agree more

[ImBill]

bella,
You may be too young to understand or assimilate the information (not that there is anything wrong with that, most of us are in the same place at one time or another in our lives here), but here is a link to a free ebook. It's about two people, one a medium and the other a recorder of the messages she receives and information she provides, and some spirits that live on or above the astral plane. Over the course of their relationship, she proves many times that she is able to access information that she couldn't possibly access physically, she does it psychically. Spirits or beings in the planes of existence above help guide them both on a journey of expanding their consciousness. Here's the link: Across the Unknown

This is the second book written about their experiences. The first one deals more with proof that their experiences are real and that the information being provided could only come from a source that is able to access information that could not possibly come from using the five senses. It's called the Betty Book. They provide insight that you will never learn in school. I've done the research and can unequivocally vouch for their authenticity. Many people are able to communicate with those on other planes of existence and have recorded their experiences prolifically. These are just good examples of what could be a lifetime's worth of reading and provide you with all you need to know in a nutshell, as it were.

I know you probably feel kind of like a leaf blowing around in an ocean of possibilities right now. Trust that experience will bring the foundation you need to build a magnificent boat for yourself, but don't for a second think that you won't have to help pound the nails and sand the decks. Good luck and godspeed!

Here's an appropriate quote: "The recognition of the things you desire, the forming of your definite
purposes, establishes a condition as automatically chemical in its action
as establishing the arrangements of any other chemical process, such as
the release of gasses or the carbonization of flame or the boiling of
water. It immediately starts toward the fulfillment of the desire in
proportion to the strength, fervor and persistence of your effort toward
it."