Sierra,
What Modules are you using? Have you logged into your Control Panel on your PATHS web site to check and see if all of your information is correct? Even if one little piece of info is wrong, it can throw off the connection.
Also, I recommend emailing
info@paths-vx.com and explaining your experience and desires with them. They are very helpful!
To change your gender to female, click on the Profiles link towards the top right of this forum and then click on My Profile on the little menu that pops up. That will take you to your personal profile page. To edit the different boxes click on the little wrench icon.